Need a lifestyle change? Change with love

I want to help people.

I want to help people by providing tools, education, knowledge and motivation to make themselves better. In particular, I want to help people improve themselves by making them healthier.

However, all the motivation in the world from me cannot make people want to make themselves healthier. And that’s okay.

A desire from within

The desire to become healthier should not come from an external source, it should come from within.

In order to make life changes that will stay long-term, you need to be motivated because you love yourself enough to implement them. You can’t be motivated by external sources such as simply the desire to look better or be a specific type of person for another individual. These motivations can spur decisions about life, but the motivation can disappear when the person disappears or when the individual creating to motivation no longer inspires the change.I was desperate for people to like me

I come from a background of putting myself down and self-punishment. I was extremely discontent with myself when I was younger because I was overweight and didn’t like the way I looked.

I gave up trying to lose weight because I had no clue what to do. I gave up because I was trying to make other people like me more.

I blamed my lack of lots of friends on the fact that I wasn’t attractive; I thought I would have more friends if I was skinnier and prettier.

She tried to fix me.

I also wanted to lose weight because my mother wasn’t happy with my weight. She tried to fix me. She brought me to the doctor to see if I had a medical condition that was causing the excess weight to stick. She tried to bribe me with money to lose weight by saying that for every pound I lost I would earn a certain amount of money.

I despised myself and didn’t know what to do.

Unplanned weight lossMe in 2010 vs 2011

When I did start to lose weight, I actually didn’t even try.

In fact, I was just striving to eat healthier. I was trying to be better than I was before.

I still didn’t necessarily love myself. However, I was changing my habits not because anybody told me to, but because I wanted better health for myself. I stopped eating so much junk food.  I ate chose healthier options at work, Subway.

I wanted to feel better and look better. I did just that by implementing simple changes.

I was losing weight because of these changes. Changes that I didn’t do for other people’s satisfaction but for me. I was becoming healthier because I cared enough to take better care for myself.

Ghosts from the past

My past can still haunt me.

Some days I’m still unsatisfied with the way I look. I put myself down because I am not yet where I want to be, aesthetically and health-wise.

However, on the better days I realize how much I have done. I remember the reason I started taking better care of myself in the beginning. It wasn’t so I could look better, make my mother happier or to gain more friends. No, the reason that I started my journey into healthier living was because I wanted something more for myself than to be 200 pounds overweight at the age of 30 with no motivation to do anything besides watch TV and have diabetes.

I love myself. I am NOT fat.

This way of thinking will not only result in a healthier body but a healthier mind as well.

Even if results cannot be seen right away, congratulate yourself that you have made a decision to improve yourself. If you eat a salad instead of fries, that’s a step in the right direction.

Does eating one salad make a person healthy? No. But choosing salads and other whole-food choices over processed junk many times in a row can. Don’t punish yourself for mistakes you have made in the past. You can’t change them. Instead, learn from mistakes.

Living in the past results in a depressed state. Live in the now and make choices that will result in a happier present and future.

Make decisions that reflect not who you are in the present, but the person you desire to be in the future.

You can change. Change with love.

  • Updated 3 years ago
Sara Binde

Sara is a health and nutrition coach. She advocates for a whole foods plant-based lifestyle and teaches the world how to achieve weight loss.